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  • Writer's pictureRobin Chestner-Hannon

Feeling Disrespected

Mesa Card on feeling disrespected
Feeling Disrespected

One of the hardest things at least for myself has been to set boundaries if I'm being disrespected or in some way feeling harmed.

I encountered something like this recently, and my sense of fairness, ethics and my own sense of right and wrong were triggered. I found myself saying the situation rubbed the wrong with me. I felt that it would call my own integrity into question if I followed the advice given to me. Furthermore, there was the prospect of losing half the funds I had put into the item. I did not pull any punches and said that the advice was not just questionable, it was downright dishonest, and I needed to live with myself.

The situation was resolved in that I was able to return an item and pick another one, but it set off feelings of guilt in myself, even though I realized that I was not in the wrong in this. I simply could not sleep because I knew my lack of tact and response had offended. I kept thinking I could have used a LOT more tact.

Then I pulled this card, and it was an ah HA moment. I realized that I have been told my entire life that I had the tact of a Brama bull in a chinashop. I was told it was not lady like, unkind, and I needed to account for my words and how they might harm someone. I think if I look in the mirror, I ended up disrespecting myself for this trait. I was embarrassed by my lack of tack and could not reconcile it with the fact that I'm also an Empath and therefore should "know better." So, I became my harshest critic, endlessly thinking and rehashing what I'd said about something. However, my laser like words have been more than just a bane, they have been a gift. As I thought more about it, I realized that I had to love all of me, including my gift or in some cases bane of a gift with words.

There is a balancing act. Words are indeed life and death to the heart and soul, but we also can't be a doormat to allow others to walk on.

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