In this world that we live in, it is a world full of trials, tribulations, pain, sorrow, loss, etc. It is also a world of amazing things, beautiful things, love, joy, healing, accomplishment, good friends, family, etc.
It is not up to me to judge God. God is the judge. I see through a glass darkly as all humans do. To explain the divine, I would need to be divine. It is not out of cowardice that I don't address the question posed. It is because I choose to trust in God. What seems to be unfairness, that is through human eyes. God's rain falls on the just and unjust.
Many do cry out in pain where is God? My reply is where are you? Are you actively seeking God's voice? Are you spending time in prayer, meditation, cultivating a relationship with the Divine? If you want help, how do you know it's not available if you have no communication or spend the time in prayer to find out?
It reminds me of the story of a man on a rooftop during a flood. God sends a boat, a helicopter, the National Guard, but the man won't come down from the roof. Eventually he dies by drowning. He goes to Heaven, and finds God and says, "Where were you! Why did you let me drown?" God replies, "I sent a boat, a helicopter and the National Guard, and you would not leave the roof. That my son was your choice. You were too busy determining what you felt I should do instead of accepting the help I offered."
Playing devil's advocate further...who are God's loved ones? Do we judge who they are or does God? Are God's loved ones just Christians? Are they just Jewish people? Maybe they are Hindu, or maybe Buddhist? What makes someone loved of God? Is it the things they do, the good deeds? Is it the faith they have? Is it following a set a rules? What defines His loved ones? God loves us, but we also have free will.
If you have a mother or father you never spent time with, never shared with, laughed with, loved, in short you have no relationship, why is it ok to come to them when you are only in trouble? Shouldn't you develop a mutual relationship with a parent heavenly or otherwise first? Any parent including God wants an active loving relationship with their children. If you have an active relationship then have faith that you are loved, and that while help may not look the way you want or expect it to, help is available.